Carrot cake for breakfast
A Koboldland-story with the Hare and the Dragon by Simon Heese

Once upon a time, a Hare and a Dragon were the very best friends forever. They lived in a tree-house in the forest. But their tree-house was not just like a regular tree-house, which usually is little more than a wooden shack nailed to a tree. It was in fact a tree that was a house. More like a house-tree. Or a tree-house-tree. A house-tree-tree-house … you get the idea. The Hare and the Dragon had their home in this tree-house, complete with a living room, bedrooms, and a kitchen. Of course, they also had a bathroom, although only the Hare enjoyed bathing, the Dragon not so much. He always claimed his red scales appeared more distinguished with a bit of patina "Patina" means something is old and dirty, but you like it that way. Their toilet, seasoned with patina, was not inside the house; it was an outhouse next to the tree-house. Essentially, an outhouse is just a hole in the ground with a plain wooden plank, so you can sit over the hole. For a little added privacy, most people eventually build some wooden walls and a door around the hole. The Dragon had even added a roof, as he loved to read during his private sessions, especially when it rained. That's the kind of toilet the Dragon and Hare had. The Dragon really enjoyed spending time on the toilet.^[1]

Now that you know where the two lived, the story can begin. Are you ready?

One morning, the Hare was preparing breakfast. "What do you feel like having?" he asked the Dragon, who was sitting with him in the kitchen. “Is any carrot cake left from yesterday?” asked the Dragon. The Hare shook his head, “No, sadly not. Should we bake another one?” The Dragon smiled, “Surefire, my dear, let’s do it!”

The Hare would have loved to bake another carrot cake for his friend, but he couldn't. They were out of flour … and carrots. They had some milk, but not enough for both cake and their hot chocolate. The butter in the fridge was past its best, and they had no eggs left. “Well, we still have sugar. That’s the good news. The bad news is, we’re missing all the other ingredients,” said the Hare. The Dragon was brave and took it lightly: “No problem, we can go and get them!”

Agreed! The Hare quickly brushed his teeth and then grabbed his backpack. “Shall we take the bike?” he asked. What a question! Of course they took the bike, what else?

When the Hare and the Dragon were riding their bike, they split the work, as the Hare's legs weren't quite long enough for the pedals. Not that they were short! He was a hare, after all, and hares have pretty long legs for their size. That’s why they are widely known for their running prowess! But cycling? Not so much – for bikes, they are just a wee bit too small. The Dragon, on the other hand, was pretty large. He reached the pedals with ease ... as well as the handlebars. Alright, you may wonder, if the Dragon was handling the pedals and the steering, what was the Hare’s job? That’s easy – He was the navigator! This was indeed a huge responsibility, as one wrong turn would mean a longer, more tiring ride for the Dragon. Fortunately, the Hare was a splendid navigator, and they only got lost every now and then.

"Okay, first we need flour!" declared the Hare. "Off to the mill." The Dragon knew the way, which meant the Hare did not have to navigate. That was fine, as the road went downhill, so the Dragon had not much work, either. "Slow down when the ro-o-o-a-ad ge-e-e-t-ts b-bum-p-p-py!" warned the Hare. "Oka-a-ay, but-t-t-t ho-old on ti-i-ight," replied the Dragon, slowing down. Soon, they arrived at the mill. "Stay with the bike, I'll get the flour," said the Dragon. "Alright," the Hare agreed, watching a butterfly who had already finished breakfast and was about to proceed with his brunch. “Err, Hare,” said the Dragon, who was already back, "I forgot to bring money." "Oh dear … no worries, I'll pay, then" the Hare offered. After he had paid for the flour, they resumed their ride. "Next, to the farm. Turn left up ahead, it's shorter that way," directed the Hare. "Okay," responded the Dragon, picking up speed in anticipation of the cake. "Hold on tight!" he called out.

At the farm, they went first to the carrot field. The Hare, being a vegetarian, was an expert on vegetables, especially carrots. This pretty much made the Dragon a vegetarian as well, but when it came to carrots, he let the Hare do his thing. While the Dragon waited, his friend carefully selected the perfect carrots for their cake. "You could go and fetch the milk. I'll pay for everything later." the Hare suggested, noticing that his buddy was getting a little bored. "Alrighty," replied the Dragon and went off towards the farmhouse.

Upon entering the house, the Dragon was greeted by the farmer. She was busy tending a little piglet, which was very small and properly pink. "Hello!" said the Dragon, "I need two bottles of milk, please." The farmer looked up, "Oh, I’m sorry, little fella, but I've just sold the last one of them," she replied. The Dragon turned pale: "What?! Oh no, but we need it for the cake and our hot chocolate!" She could sense his distress. After thinking for a moment, she offered: "Well, if it's that urgent, you're welcome to go to the pasture and get some yourself." The Dragon looked a bit uncertain, "Uh, okay. Sure, I can do that! Err, the meadow is this way?" The farmer nodded, "Yes, exactly. Don't forget to take a bucket."

So the Dragon took the bucket and went out to the pasture, where the cows were standing, chewing their breakfast. Some were actually chewing their dinner. Cows are ruminants, which means, they eat every meal several times. It’s quite possible for a cow to chew her breakfast, lunch and dinner at once. For most people this would be an ugly mess and not very tasty. For cows this is fine, as they only eat grass, which blends with everything. With every other grass, that is.

"Yummy, huh?" asked the Dragon, trying to break the ice. The cow just looked at him and continued to chew. "Looks like it.." the Dragon concluded. "Hey, could I get some milk?" The cow kept chewing. "Uh... please?" he added, as he started to run out of ideas. Chew, chew. "Look, I've got this bucket here..." Chew, chew, chew. The Dragon was lost, what should he do now?

From the distance, the Hare saw the Dragon talking to a cow, frantically waving his arms. He had just found the last perfect carrot and was about to head to the farmhouse. However, as his friend seemed to be increasingly desperate, he decided to go over and check on him first.

"What are you doing, Dragon?"
"I'm getting milk!"
"And how are you doing that?" inquired the Hare. The Dragon sighed, "With the bucket, of course! But the cow is refusing to give any milk. She just keeps chewing!"
"You do know where milk comes from, don't ya?"
"Of course!"
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, from cows! That's why I'm standing here in front of one."
The Hare giggled, "Mind handing me the bucket. I'll show you the trick."
"Here! Let's see, if you do better" the Dragon mumbled. The Hare was actually a lot better at it. He placed the bucket under the cow's udder and started milking. "See, Dragon, this is how it's done." The Dragon was amazed; he always bought milk in bottles. It was the first time none was available and the farmer had sent him to the field. Apparently, the Hare had been in this situation before, as he knew exactly what to do and soon the bucket was half filled. "That should be enough," he said. "Thank you, Mrs. Cow! Enjoy your breakfast-lunch-dinner." The cow kept chewing.

They returned to the farmer, who poured the milk into two bottles. "Need anything else?" she asked. "Eggs, please," the Hare replied. The Dragon, swinging the bucket, offered to collect them from the chickens, but the farmer told him she had some ready. "Lucky me," sighed the Dragon, who had no idea how to place a bucket under a chicken. They paid for their purchases — well, the Hare did, as the Dragon had forgotten his money. Then they carefully rode back. Super carefully of course, as they were carrying eggs.

Back home, they went straight to the kitchen.^[2] The Dragon poured flour into the large bowl and the Hare brought a jar with sugar. "Easy with the sugar," cautioned the Dragon, "I'm trying to get in shape." So the Hare added only a healthy pinch of sugar and a chunk of butter. As the Dragon started to stir enthusiastically and the Hare was about to pour in the milk, they suddenly heard soft sobs. In the corner of the kitchen lay a purple cat and cried. "How did you get in here? And why are you crying?" asked the Dragon, concerned. Through teary eyes, the cat looked at him accusingly. "Earlier, you had no more butter, and you also didn't buy any!" "And so...?" The Hare was confused, "...where is the problem?" "You just put butter in the bowl! But you actually have none left!" The cat was obviously very unhappy.

"We did forget the butter, that's true. But then we realized it on the way home and borrowed some from our neighbor, Miss Owl," the Hare explained. "And how should anyone in the world know that? I thought you'd just forgotten and altered the story!" the cat was quite offended. "What story?" Now, the Hare was genuinely confused. "Never mind! Just pay more attention next time, okay?" stated the cat, and with that, she jumped out of the kitchen window. "Dude, what was that?" the Dragon was thoroughly baffled. "I think it's about not forgetting ingredients," the Hare guessed. "Yeah, that's what she said. But why was she purple?" The Hare had no idea.^[3]

"Alright, back to the cake," said the Dragon, who was really hungry. "Milk!" proclaimed the Hare and poured it into the bowl. "Can you stir and then add the eggs? I'll grate the carrots in the meantime." "Sure," replied the Dragon, aware of how much the Hare cared for carrots. So the Dragon stirred the batter while the Hare grated what you could easily call the world's most delicate carrot shreds.
"Should we add cinnamon, like last time?" asked the Dragon.
"For sure!"
"Okidoki… and hot sauce?"
"What?!?"
"Ha ha, just kidding," the Dragon laughed. He did enjoy spicy food of course. It's good for fire-breathing, as his grandma used to say. But since he lived in a forest with his Hare friend, he was hardly ever allowed to produce even little flames. Fire-breathing is strictly off-limits in the forest, due to the risk of wildfires. The Dragon was well aware of this, and now you are too: no fire-breathing in the forest, okay?

Finally, the carrots were finely grated and the batter was smooth with a note of cinnamon. The Hare gently added the carrots, and the Dragon carefully folded them in. They poured the mix in the baking pan and slid it into the hot oven. Now all they had to do was wait. “How about a game of cards while the cake is baking?” suggested the Hare. “Yes, but no cheating!” the Dragon responded mockingly. “Of course not. And we should make some hot chocolate. I have a feeling that this purple cat might come back, if we forget about it.”